Alternate Christmas-Writers block

 If you missed my first post, check it out here: https://stumblingfillies.blogspot.com/2022/07/christmas-in-july.html

I actually wrote the version below first, then shortly after had the idea for the Christmas in July. 

She had a severe case of writer's block. Usually, all it took her was a bottle of Jack Daniels and some Weed and the words would flow. It probably didn't help that she was in Australia for Christmas. It just didn’t feel like Christmas to her when it was the middle of summer. “Christmas, that was it!” She thought. She might be 18, which was really too old to write Santa, but it WAS something to write. Still puffing on her weed infused cirigret, she took a sip of whiskey, and began to type on her typewriter.

Dear Santa,

Hope yoo arr doin grade! Iss been a long timme since I lazz wrote.  I havve been a gooond girl, only sometimes naughdy. Cernnly ann angel wenn sober. Though recennly, thass nod been too often.  I'm a bit titsy ann high azz i write thiss ledder t' yoo, azz i've been sufferin frum writer's block, since November. 

She stopped here for another sip of whiskey and to to puff on her weed-cirgret, which she’d gotten at the awards banquet. As she smoked, her right bra strap slid off her right shoulder and her pantys hid in her pants, her plumbers crack visible, as she reviewed her letter so far.

She realized that she was making a lot of 

mistakes due to how high and drunk she was, but she made no attempt to fix them, just happy to again be writing. Cigaret in mouth she tured around, and adjusted her white lace bra; as soon as she got the right strap in place, the left slid off her shoulder, and she had to brace herself to stay upwrite.

Another sip of jack, and she turned and resumed writing.

It starred wenn i won several awards ad the writers associashun awards banqued, ann got wasded thad not silent night. Since thenn, thiss Ledder is the firzz i've been able t' write, despite genn zzzrunk ann high frequennly. I thing yoo'll agree sanna, genn high ann zzzrunk shunnn pud me onna naughdy lizz. Yoo see, sanna, genn zzzrunk ann high is juzz necessary fer the creative procezz.  I'll annmit, it wuzzin necessary fer me t' ged sooo zzzrunk ann high ad the awards banqued.  I havve myself t' blame.  I shose t' wear a fancy silk zzrezz, bud it wuz sooo low cut inna back ann fronn, i cuddent wear unnerwear.  Thad made me feel naughdy ann nervous, it wuz sooo shord ann fancy.  Sooo i had several glasses uhf wine before i caught the cab frum the hotel.  Thenn, ad the evenn, the weed ann champaign where flowin', ann wiss my nerves, welll, i smoked ann zzrank.  Thenn i won the firzz award.  Sooo i celebraded wiss shoss uhf voddka.  By the timme the big award came 'round, ihwuzz zzzrunk ann high.  Thenn i won it! sooo thenn the pardy really began.  I doan 'member mush affer thad, buddiff it wuz naught, it wuzza gooond wayssed kinn.

She took a long drag of her cigarette, and another sip of JD. Then she continued:

I really hope im nod on yer naught lizz thiss yeer sanna.  Im jussa gooond girl whoo likes t' write ssories, ann tenns t' ged zzzrunk ann high in doin' sooo.  Pleeeze f'rgive my typin', im zzzrunk ann high ride now. Pleeeze f'rgive my typin', i'm zzzrunk ann high ride now.  It feels sooo gooond, 'specially now'at i'm writin', eeven iff iss jussa ledder t' sanna. 

Sooo fer chrissmas, i'd liyke t' ass yoo fer ideas fer more ssory's, ann iff iss nod stoo mush trouble, lossa booze ann weed. I will ged zzzrunk ann high fer chrissmas regardlezz, bud i doo hope yoo brin' me somethin' speshul. XXOO

Innoxicatedly yours,

With that, she gleefully stood. She swayed like the bells on Santa's slay, and then triumphantly grabbed the Jack Daniels bottle. She poured a generous amount into her glass, and drank.She filled it once more, and then staggered across about the room, before removing the paper from the typewriter and sitting to the right of it to read her letter, her left bra strap now falling to nearly her elbow, as she bent it and siped the whiskey.

At first, the intoxicated young writer was pleased, shed broken her writer's block. However, as her slightly blurred vision made it over the page, she became frustrated-her writing was so messed up; And who ever heard of an adult woman writing to santa? A drunk and high one, that who, she realized as she crumpled the paper, in frustration. 

She fixed her bra, and stood to get another weed-cigarette. She swayed like a tree in blizzard as she staggered about her hot bedroom in the summer heat in Australia in search of her cigarette. Once she got one, she struggled to light it, and then took a long drag. She poured another glass of whiskey, and drank most of it before laying down on the bed, legs resting on the chair with the typewriter, and un crumpled the letter. 

Yes she was drunk and high, but she was an adult, and she loved it! And hopefully Santa would too! And thus she resolved she would send the letter to Santa. She sat up, drained her whiskey, and sat it on the typewriter beside the whiskey bottle. She was even drunker and higher now, but she threaded the paper into the typewriter, and retyped the letter, with even more mistakes, but she was too messed up to notice or care. 

Dear Santa,

Hope yoo arr doin grade!I am! Iss veen a longg timme since I lazz wrote. I havve been a gooond girl, only sometimes Naughdy. Cernnly ann Angel wenn ssober. Though recennly, thass nod been too often. I'm sssrunk ann high azz fuck ass i write thiss ledder 2 yoo, azz i've been sufferin frum writer's block, since NOvember.

It starred wenn i won several awards ad the writers associashun awards banqued, ann got wasded thad nod silenn night. Since then, thiss Ledder is the firzz i've been able 2 write, despite genn zzzrunk ann high frequ..often. I thing yoo'll agree Sanna, genn high ann zzzrunk shunnn pud me onna naughdy lizz. Yoo see, Sanna, genn zzzrunk ann high is juzz necessary fer da creative procezz. I'll annmit, it wuzzin necessary fer me 2 ged sooo zzzrunk ann high ad the awards banqued. I havve myself 2 blame. I shose 2 wear a fancy silk zzrezz, bud it wuz sooo low cut inna back ann fronn, i cuddent wear unnerwear! Thad made me feel naughdy ann nervous, it wuz sooo shord ann fancy. Sooo i had several glasses uhf wine before i caught the cab frum the hotel. Thenn, ad the evenn, the weed ann champaign where flowin', ann wiss my nerves, welll, i smoked ann zzrank. Thenn i won the firzz award! Sso i celebraded wiss shoss uhf voddka! By the timme the big award came 'round, ihwuzz zzzrunk ann high. Thenn i won it! sooo thenn the pardy really began. I doan 'member mush affer thad, buddiff it wuz naught, it wuzza gooond wayssed kinn.

I really hope im nod on yer naught lizz thiss yeer Sanna. Im jussa gooond girl whoo likes 2 write ssories, ann tenns 2 ged zzzrunk ann high in doin' sooo.  Pleeeze f'rgive my typin', im fuggin' wayssed ride now. Pleeeze f'rgive my typin', i'm sooo fffucked up ride now.  It feels sooo gooond, 'specially now'at i'm writin', eeven iff iss jussa ledder 2 Sanna. 

Sooo fer Chrissmas, i'd liyke 2 ass yoo fer ideas fer more ssory's, ann iff iss nod stoo mush trouble, lossa booze ann weed. I will ged zzzrunk ann high fer chrissmas regardlezz, bud i doo hope yoo brin' me somethin' speshul. XXXOO0

Sooo Innoxicatedly yours,

P. S.  Few brin' booze ann weed, brin' ssrong ssuff.  I'll be zzzrinkin' ann smokin' waitin' fer yoo on Chrissmas eve!

Happy, she carefully removed the letter and folded it. She than drank the last of the Jack Daniels whiskey from the bottle, and fell back onto the bed, clutching the letter to her bosom with her right hand.

Her left hand meanwhile found its way into her trousers, and began to rub her pussy. She imagined Santa visiting her, as she passed out.

The end.