StumblingFillies

I wrote this last year, but had trouble posting: https://stumblingfillies.blogspot.com/2023/04/easter-bunny.html Looks like maybe im having better luck this year.   Rosie makes a good easter bunny. She loves grass, and when she’s high, she gets thirsty. And the best drink is liquor, lots of it. In other words, she’s the stoned, boozed easter bunny. This easter, it's just her and her boyfreind. Drunk and stoned, Rossie bounced up the stairs, leaving a trail of chocolate-weed eggs up the stairwell and into the office. She hippity-hopped up the steps bouncing drunkenly off the walls with her furry pink rabbit ears and matching fluffy tail, delivering tasty treats for her to enjoy later. As she went, at each step, she deposited an egg, and took a sip of rum, or a hit of her joint, of both. Halfway up, the intoxicated bunny stumbled and sat on a step. She slurred, “Timme fer more grazz,” as she pulled out and lit a new joint. She took a long drag, then pulled the joint from her lips and...

 I close the series of Historical women IF with just a photo-Joan of Arc

  For last week's spring breakers, the week of fun, sun, and partying draws to a close. The wine, the beer, the whiskey, the weed, the drugs, it's been a wild week the girls will only remember in blurs. Some have already left to return to school yesterday, faced with long drives. Some will fly out or start shorter drives today. Some may skip class tomorrow to party one last day today. Hopefully only a few won’t decide to not return at all, dropping out.  The party will go on, though, for other schools take the last week of March, a few even take weeks as late as april. But the numbers will dwindle. That is especially true with good Friday on March 29 and Easter on the 31st this year.  “Timme rolls by, the clock doan stopp i wish i had a few more zzrops uhf the gooond ssuff, the gooond times oh, bud theey juzz keep on flyin' ride on by, liyke it ai'nn nothin' i wish i had me a, a pause buddon momenns liyke those, lord nose i'd hit it ann give myself fife more...

Once upon a time, there was a young woman of 18. She had long golden blonde hair, blue eyes, big tits, and a round butt. Her name was Goldilocks. One warm spring day, Goldilocks was walking in the woods. It was such a warm day that when she reached the house of the Three bears, she was quite thirsty. She knocked on the door, but got no answer. Oh so thirsty ,she tried the door. Finding it unlocked, she let herself in. On the table, she found three bottles. The first was very big, for it was Papa Bear's. Goldilocks grabbed the bottle, opened it and drank. As she gulped it down, she realized it was strong bitter liquor. It was too bitter for her and It made her cough. Thirsty, she drank it all down. When she finished it, she was still coughing. She sat the first bottle back on the table, and in an attempt to stop coughing, she picked up the second middle sized bottle. She quickly opened it, and drank. As she drank, she noticed it was a very sweet Rum as it was Mom...

  “Daytona beash on sprin' break 18 girls upp on ssage white t-shirss 'bout t'be sprayed wiss water oh, let'er gow boys” she sang along to Brad Paisley's “Water.” Her tank top was soaked in water, and her brain in booze. It was clear the well endowed and equally drunk redhead would win this years Spring break wet T-Shirt contest, even if she was wearing a tank top.

 Part 1: https://stumblingfillies.blogspot.com/2024/03/spring-break-brooklyn.html It had come as a great relief when all your Friday classes were canceled. Immediately after your last on Thursday, you grabbed your bag and practically ran to your truck. As you hopped in your truck you tried calling your girlfriend Brooklyn, but she didn’t answer. You weren’t surprised. She was probably too drunk and high. God you love that big titted girl-she's a hot number sober, and an even hotter mess drunk and high. Brooklyn was a wild one. It worried you what trouble she might get into without you, but you pushed the feeling down. But hey, who doesn't love a little trouble every now and then? It was spring break after all. Driving through the night, stopping for lots of coffee, you arrived in Florida mid morning. You parked, and tried calling her again. No answer. You got out of the truck, glad for the air-b-n-b so you could go in and see if she was there, and if not, crash for a while. B...

  “Live yer life whale yoo havve it,” Florence Nightingale slurred, and took a drag of her joint. “Finish that drink Flo, and we’ll try this bottle,” you told the nurse. “Is it ssrong?” she asked and then finished her drink. “Very Flo,” you answered the very wasted Florence. She held her empty glass out and said, “Gooond mennnsnnn.  fill me upp.  I love genn zzzrunk ann high.” As you poured, she pulled off her kneck scarf.

  On a sun-drenched beach, your two friends, Libby and Lily, had found the perfect spot to unwind under the shade of an umbrella. With the ocean's melody in the background and the sand between their toes, they toasted to a day of relaxation with a chilled bottle of hard grape kneehigh and shots of vodka. Their laughter mingled with the seabreeze, and as they sipped their drinks, making drunken spring break memories that would be as enduring as the endless blue horizon before them.

  “Oh, hello ssep brozzer,” your stepsister greeted you with a surprised tone to her slurred words. As the gentle sea breeze played with her hair, Mia leaned against the railing of the beachside promenade, lost in intoxication. She was far higher than the sun was high in the sky, yet the sun cast a warm glow on her flushed skin, and the sound of the waves provided a soothing backdrop to her daydreams. She had come here seeking a moment of escape, a brief respite from the hustle and bustle of the beach. With each breath of salty air, she felt her worries lighten, carried away by the ocean's timeless rhythm thanks to alcohol and weed. It was a moment of simple bliss, a snapshot of summer serenity that she would tuck away in her memory, to be revisited whenever the world became too much to bear.   “Hello Mia,” you greeted her, “Looks like your enjoying spring break.” “Oh, verry mush.  Liyke doan stell mom ann yer dad, bud liyke i have'nn been sober since friday.  Shay, ...

  "I'm nod liyke ozzer college girls, professor," Penelope slurred, swaying drunkenly on the motionless boat. You looked at your student, who stood at the bow of the gleaming white sailboat, her tousled hair gently caressed by the sea breeze. The azure waters surrounded you, reflecting the sun's warm glow, highlighting Penelope youthful exuberance and adventurous spirit. “I doan ged zzzrunk,” she continued, stopping to pour another shot of vodka. You stifled a laugh. “Penelope, dear. You are drunk,” you told her. She giggled, gulped her drink and said, “Welll yes, l am zzzrunk.  Whad i med t'say is i doan ged zzzrunk wiss ssrange men on sprin' break.”  “So you’re only drunk on my boat because you know me?” you inquired. “Nod only.  bud iss pard uhf the reason.  Shay, thiss boat gotta radio?,” she answered before changing the topic. You turned it on. Kenny Chesneys “Summer time” was playing. Penelope began to sing along.  “Bikini boddoms unnerneath bud the b...

  “Show my boyfrienn wee're behavin' on sprin' break girls.  Shay high t' my boy frienn girls, “your girlfriend said, turning the camera to show the three of them on the bed. Even before they spoke, you knew they were all drunk and high. “High,” they both slurred, and flashed peace signs.  As your girlfriend turned the phone back to her, you asked, “Brooklyn babe, are you all drunk and high? How is that behaving?” “Yes were zzzrunk ann high.  Bud we’re inna hotel room,” Brooklyn told you.  That much was true, “Damn. Wish I was with you,” you said. Brooklyn agreed, “Me too. Me too.  Sprin' break izz'nn azz mush fun wiss oud yoo.” “But you’ll still have fun, I know you. Just try to behave yourself. I’ll be there as soon as I can on Friday.” you reminded her. “Thad'll be grade,” she answered. “Ok, babe, ive gotta get to class. Talk to you later, love. “Ok love, bye,” she said, blowing you a sloppy kiss before she disconnected the line. Damn, why couldn’t y...

  “Happy sainn paddys day! Yoo godda sry ower mine julep” the waitress at the tiki bar greeted you and your friends.  “How many havve yoo had?,” your girlfreind asked. “Me, jussa couple,” she answered.  “What’s your name,” you asked. “Esmeralda,” she answered.  “Well Esmeralda, Ihere there super strong, or youvehad more than that,” your friend Ben started “Bud wee doan care.  Iss sprin' break ann st.  Paddy's day.  Perfeckt timme fer hod zzzrunk girls,” your girlfriend said taking the drink.

Pepper was supposed to go with her friends downtown for the Saint Patrick's day party at Kittys. However, she overdid the pre-party a bit too much-she was drunk and high-and somehow got left behind. Feeling brave thanks to the weed and booze, she decided to hitchhike to the bar. Thus she found herself on the street corner when a white toyota pulled over. She quickly stumbled forward, and leaned against the frame of the rolled down window. “Heyyyy, i neeeda ride downtown t' Kiddys bar,” not recognizing the driver she slurred, leaning on the car. “Pepper, is that you?” the driver asked, surprised to see her. “Ummmm yah. I nowe yoo, doan i?”, Pepper asked. “Yah, Pepper, we went to High School to….” he started. She cut him off. “Oh, Danny! sorry! iss been sooo long. ann im a bit fffucked up, few canned stell,” she told him “I see. Well get in,” Danny told her. Once she was in, Danny said, “Im just getting off work. How about we swing by my place and I can change into somethi...

 Captain Dunsel (https://www.patreon.com/CaptainDunsel) has a group series of spring break images with text going. I've decided to follow suit with my own. Up first, is a found image and some AI words. Amidst the vast, sunbaked expanse of the desert, Mercedes stood swaying by her father's gleaming orange classic Mercedes-Benz. The car was a symbol of vintage elegance against the rugged backdrop of the desert landscape. Mercedes, with her tousled blonde hair and blue eyes glassy like a mirage, was a vision of modern charm standing drunkenly next to the vintage vehicle. You and Mercedes had been driving for hours on your way to spring break at Lake Havasu. Her father had generously loaned you his prized car, entrusting you to take care of his Mercedes. As you drove through the desert, the sun beating down relentlessly, the two of you couldn't help but feel an exhilarating sense of freedom and adventure. Mercedes broke out a bottle of vodka and lit a joint.  The joint and bott...

  “The nile flows wiss alcaall through the heard uhf egypt, ann egypt flows through he heard uhf cleopatra, whoo zzrings the alcaall”-Cleopatra

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  Women, liyke men, shud sry t' do the impossible.  Ann wenn theey fail, therre failure shud be a shallenge t' ozzers.

  Blonde in slip: Janye Mansfeild 1933 5’6” 40-22-35 36d 128# Blond in back: Marlyn monroe 1926 5’6” 36-24-34 36d 118# Yellow skirt brunette: Audrey hepburn 1929 5’7” 34-20-34 34a/32a 103# Smoker: Ava gardner 1922 5’6” 36-23-37 34b 119# It took a large supply of booze, weed and drugs to shoot an issue of Glamour Photography Magazine. Which is why it was so short lived. The last issue is what did them in. Somehow, they managed to get Janye Mansfeild, Marlyn Monroe, Audrey Hepburn and Ava Gardner together. Sadly, the photos were lost, but someone managed to paint one picture.  “'Nuzzer joinn allready, Ava?,” the blond in the pink slip slurred as she stumbled and leaned on the trailer as she tried to climb in.  “Yess, Azz soon azz i ged it lit; yoo wann a zzrag affer Ava ann I?” the girl in the yellow skirt asked.  “Y'know yoo doo, Jayne. Wee alll shud share it Audrey,” the other blond said, now pulling her pink panties off. “Is the pope catholic? yes, pazz the ...

 March is Woman's History Month. I don't know how many I'll figure out posts for, but check back each Friday to see if I am able to imagine any as historical figures as IF girls. “Led 'em eat cake,” Marie Antionette